So here is a compilation of random things that have been going through my head in the past 4 months. There is no logic or order here. Just some ramblings.
- Being 40 and pregnant is hard. Why didn’t I accidentally get knocked up when I was like 25 and wasn’t so set in my ways and so, you know, old.
- People who say pregnancy is a beautiful journey, well I kind of want to punch them in the throat.
- Morning sickness is the most successful diet I have been on in the past 20 years. I lost 15 pounds in the first month. Here’s to no appetite and constant vomiting!!
- I have lived with anxiety and depression my whole life but I had never had an actual anxiety attack. Until last night. And you know what, they suck balls. The prospect of a kid is scary.
- Am I ever going to sleep properly again. The whole don’t lie on your back because it cuts of blood flow to the baby thing is terrifying. I am a back sleeper and I am trying to change but constantly waking with a start thinking “I am killing the baby.” Overly-dramatic? Yes! But it is where I am at.
- The Chinese believe that drinking cold water is bad for the baby? It’s 37 Celsius outside with 65% humidity. I am drinking cold water.
- My doctor said no sex until 24 weeks. That’s a good enough reason to find a new doctor, right?
- I only want to eat french fries and drink coke. It is hard to find good french fries sometimes. I would literally move back to Saskatchewan so I could be close to poutine some days.
- This is scary. I am terrified. I hope that goes away.